ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize
