If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
