When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
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