So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Randomize