if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I am one with the molecules
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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