1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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