Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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