CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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