absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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