turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
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