eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
this hospital has no fireball
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
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