p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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