No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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