So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
of course. lets lasso hookers.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
