after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
