I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I will pee on everything he values.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
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