She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Randomize
