The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
