as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
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