Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
