There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
