Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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