i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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