Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Randomize
