she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
This is my gift to your gina
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize