Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
