You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize
