I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
