O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
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