We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize
