I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I have aggressive nipples.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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