I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I'm just crazy horny about you
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize