How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Randomize
