im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
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