She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Randomize
