She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
