Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Randomize
