i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
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