Christians are straight up FREAKS
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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