He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
