We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
