I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Randomize
