I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
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