So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
