she was so not down for the gang bang
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
my vag is so smooth its legendary
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
