just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
