Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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