it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
