i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
