yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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