Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
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