He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
This house was built for laser tag.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
